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An open letter to me at 16

February 24, 2019

Dear Lynda or Kkellie, 

It’s me, your older self, I know right now you’d want me to drop a hint to prove that I’m the one but at the same time you wouldn’t want me spilling any of your hideous secrets, like the one time you snuck a boy into the house and just the same minute mum came home 😏😏, okay now you’re sure it’s me so I’d leave the rest of the details behind. There’s a few things I would want you to know about this scary big deal called life. 

First off, all those nightmares and series of sleep paralysis didn’t kill you, at least you’ve made it to 22 and you’re almost 23 and still dealing with it. You’re stronger than your feeble mind makes you believe you are and boy! if you know the fights you’ve conquered emotionally, to think of it would bring you to tears. Drop those romance novels and college movies, they are totally messing with your head. Love isn’t so easy in the adult world and if you had any idea about it just maybe you’d have stuck around with the boy who one time sent you K9’s Blessings because that was how he felt about you. He’s 5 years deep in his relationship and they are actual goals (don’t pout, it’s too early). Love isn’t magical, or I’m made to believe that and oh you actually did meet your soulmate once but you know, life happened and you both split up. Yes! it sucks that bad in the adult world and those novels will make it worse. No boy wants to dance in the rain or snuggle up or show you off to the world, it’s all just an illusion, so while you can, embrace all the comfort of love those pages give you.

Love is just an illusion, an art of your imaginations

If you had thought you’d stop being acrophobic, that’s a lie, you never get over your fears. You almost died one time on a pirate ship and if I can warn you fast enough, amusement parks are not for you. You puked after a ride in Aladdin’s cup and you think you can get on a rollercoaster? The only thing on that spiral ride is your emotions *scoffs* . Did you ever believe you’d battle with depression? Oh here is how it all begins: you started eating a lot, your dreams of being MBGN totally went down the drain cos no beauty queen weighs almost a hunnid, then you started over thinking things and imagining all the possibilities if things were different and food became your only comfort and you became an alcoholic for a bit and cried yourself to sleep, the sad part, no one ever saw your struggle because on the outside you covered it up by being rude. So drop all that junk you’re holding, sit your crown up straight and achieve your dreams of being a queen.

Having a clique isn’t the ultimate, most of these girls are scorpions, they would sting you while you’re not looking. Be your own squad, have one or two good friends and stop being an open book for crying out loud. Humans feed on your insecurities, it helps them feel better. Don’t say I didn’t warn you. Don’t ever settle for anything average, boys, grades and friends. One fun fact, there’s always a replacement for everything in the adult world so keep being the smart kid you are.

Squad goals aren’t actual goals fr

Life is going to throw a lot of shitty shades on you. Here’s one, you didn’t even eventually study law and you have a passion for broadcasting, I know me too, I’m surprised. Things don’t always always go the way you plan it little one, it’s scary out here but no matter what happens, just keep moving, don’t ever stop till you’re almost a hunnid. Pray!! I can’t even emphasis on this enough because it’s taken me places, God really does answer. Take Him seriously, you can start now, it’s never too late, the earlier the better.

Never limit yourself or your potentials for anyone, be adventurous. Road trips are going to be your thing so be prepared. Oh, while you’re squeezing up with your brothers reading this just know you finally got your own room 😆😆. Like a whole room to yourself, your own private space finally, it’s not all fancy but it’s better than the one you never had. Uni went smoothly but we won’t get on that path today.

It isn’t this extra but then it’s near perfect!

I know I must have said you shouldn’t be an open book but then also be less carefree. I don’t want you getting hurt in the future. Between all that scolding, mum really loves you and wants the best for you and believe me when I say you guys would become best friends kinda 😂. When you’re in your first year, please don’t date that 400lvl Architecture boy, he’s a failed scam 😪. I know you’re stubborn and just might not listen, but I’m 22 and I have more experience yunno. About friendship, it’s the ones you least expect that would stick around the most and just be prepared baby girl, a lot of people would dislike you cos hate is such a strong word. While you’re still daddy’s girl, embrace it cos it won’t last forever 😔😔. Your dream life won’t come early but maybe if you fix things fast enough, it would. You finally became a blogger btw ,I know we would work on the vlogging thing. There are no limits remember?   And also,  Kaylie won the fight over Kkellie, it just might have taken over your real name 😂.

Your older self, Kay or just.  maybe WNG❤.

 

*all pictures are from Pinterest as you’ve guessed. 

 

Lynda

Hi, faves! I’m Ndubuaku Lynda, a blogger, content creator and storyteller. I’m also a freelance writer. I also inspire millennials through my blog show. There are different categories on the blog. Get comfortable! Need to reach me? Send an email to ndubuakulynda@gmail.com or a dm to @whitenigeriangirl on IG

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