Fear and Self-doubt have become my best friends. I…
If you know me, you’d know crushing is like a hobby for me. I mean, what else can I do with all these beautiful men on earth 🤷. Please be a musician and you’re on the top of that crushing list or maybe an actor or just be a fine man 😉😉.
Let’s throw it back to when I met one of my many celebrity crushes. Calm down, it’s not who you think it is, I mean his story is for another day or maybe a never day. It’s not my “braided” crush so calm your nerves. Now who’s ready for story time cos I’m eager to tell ☺.
During one of my aimless vacations, I called a friend up and he was like “Babe you definitely have to show up, like the turn up tonight is mad, no need to look too peng, just come already”. I was already dressed and when I got to the club my friend showed me the way to his table, my bff and I. What was I wearing that day 🤔, just a top and a jean skirt with this gladiator inspired sandals. I won’t lie, I was fineeeee that night. I wasn’t even going to let any girl intimidate me because those girls that day eh, looked like they were on a mission to “pepper” people or so I thought until I saw them rounding one of my many crushes. Ah, ah so this bros is here, that was me and next thing shakara from no where entered my body.
I low-key feel like I have this gift, like if I like you, there’s no way you’re not noticing me back. I don’t know how it happens or how to explain it but then it happens a lot. So that night, all my crush and I did was stare at each other. And just as you guessed, the night went and all we did was stare. Calm down, the story doesn’t end there. I met someone else in the club and he took my number. We chatted for a few and because there was a vibe he invited me to his place. People!!! the house I was invited to, has my crush living in it. I had no idea until I saw this portrait of him in the sitting room. “Breathe Lynda, just breathe” that was me when he came down stairs to get something from the dining. “Hi, have I seen you somewhere? Do you stay around?”.Where is my voice, because that minute I just couldn’t find it, I didn’t even know I was good at stuttering. Just when I was about to say hi back, I realised I had created 1 minute of awkward staring silence. “Welcome sha, get comfortable okay?” I just nodded and felt hot flushes on my body. It took my best friend tapping me for me to snap out of my shock. Don’t get judgy, I mean I wasn’t expecting to see him and I hadn’t planned a convo in my head.
Like an hour later, he came down to eat and of all positions on that table, he chose the one that faced me directly. I fought the urge to steal a few glances and whenever I did he was just there staring and flashing that heavenly dentition at me. I had already created a marriage scene in my head, he was looking very fine in that white shirt so a white suit would be perfect and then I’d be different by wearing a blue gown, just like the one I had on. “I have a gig later today, do you have a curfew? You and your best friend can come along” Before my best friend could remind me that we had undone laundry at home, I already screamed yes. When he went up to get dressed, you should have heard the mini fight I had with my best friend. That was all the brain adjusting I needed. He came down, looking like my future husband and was like, are you guys ready?. “Something came up and we just have to go home real quick”,those were like the saddest words I’ve ever said till this day. “I should get your number or something, maybe when you’re free we could link up or something”. Let’s not get too excited, I mean I gave him the number but he hasn’t noticed I’ve been free since that day so he hasn’t called 🤷.
So let’s just say, I met and lost bae the same day. And that laundry? I never got my lovelorn self to do it that day. I was staring at my phone waiting for his call, I’ve even thought of going to his house to tell him I’m free but a girl has self respect 😂😂. Well we crossed paths one other time and you want to know what happened? He asked for my number again, saying he lost it the last time. I did not bother myself because this time I saw him put his phone in his pocket without hitting the “save” button. Maybe he just wasn’t future husband. That white suit was just not for him. I went to the list I had made of my crushes and I cancelled his name with red ink. Like I brought out the ink and poured on his name, yes I’m that dramatic. Is there a list? Well yes, in my head 😀.
So that’s it with that one time I thought I had met celebrity bae. The next time I see him, I’m passing, I don’t even care. If he tries to “hi” me, I’m not even about to answer him. You can’t break my heart twice and want me back, or maybe not.
Ever had or met your celebrity crush? You could low-key tell me your story, I won’t laugh, I promise.
We could plan our revenge together 🤷.